Was chatting with an overseas friend's hubby, she recently had a baby and he was talking about "paternity leave", and he was saying (complaining?) that he wanted to take leave a little while later because he wasn't getting any rest and stuff so it wasn't like proper leave. I can't speak for other countries, but here in SA, there is no such thing as paternity leave. I suggested to him that he enjoy the time off.
Was asked a strange question by him, along the lines of "do you like children", but I hadn't a chance to reply to that when he laughed and said it was a silly question. He then went on to say that it is obvious that I would, apart from being a woman and it being my role in the world to carry it (a baby).
Basically he was telling me that I'm only on this earth so that I can pop babies out for some guy somewhere who decides I'm the one that should bear his burden and give birth to it?
Ok yes I agree that everyone is entitled to their own opinion and all that, but it's shit enough that your OWN BODY is convinced that that is your sole purpose in life without other (male?!) people telling me that that's my role in the world.
Ok sure, it's an opinion, along with things along the lines of "you will burn in hell for not believing in God!!" but hello, you have a choice not to pray if you don't believe in God.
My thoughts on the kids/no kids matter: I will have kids when I and I alone am ready. I cannot say whether I will or won't want; at this stage I do not want any. It depends on how I feel, when I am ready. I believe that the readiness to have kids comes about when you have such a close bond with your partner that you want to share such a thing with them. The lack of an urge to procreate doesn't mean you don't feel that way. It just means that you don't want kids. It's a personal choice.
No one can tell you to have kids, it is ultimately YOU who will have to deal with the results for the rest of your life. The people who pressured you won't be affected at all by your having kids.
It's YOUR life.
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